“Wait, That’s Not Normal?”: 25 Childhood Experiences People Thought Were Universal

Childhood shapes the way we see the world, often making us believe that our family traditions, daily routines, or even bizarre experiences are completely normal—until we grow up and realize they weren’t.

A Reddit user recently asked, “What’s something from your childhood that you thought was normal, but isn’t actually normal at all?” The responses ranged from hilarious to heartbreaking, proving that sometimes, we don’t recognize the oddities of our upbringing until much later in life. Here are some of the most surprising and thought-provoking answers.

#1

Image source: WillINevah, stockking Not eating dessert. I didn't even know what dessert was until I was out at a restaurant with a friend from middle school and her parents. Friend's parent: "What do you want for dessert?" Me: "For...for what?" Friend's parent: "Dessert! Don't you want some cake or a hot fudge sundae?" Me: "Is it someone's birthday?" It was thoroughly confusing. My family had breakfast, lunch (at school for the kids), and dinner. That was it. You had your food, that's it. Sometimes my parents would have coffee with breakfast, and that's as desserty as our meals ever got.

#2

Not being allowed to take medicine that a doctor prescribed for you because it's "too strong". I've had chronic pains in my legs for My entire life. My grandparents would often take my prescriptions and give me benadryl or ibuprofen instead. My grandma claims that the doctors just couldn't figure out what was wrong (and to her credit there was one moron who claimed that my legs hurt because I was too fat for them), but it was really because I was never taking the medication they were actually giving me. Also, if my brother or I got a really nice toy, my grandfather would take it to "prevent us from messing it up". We would have to come and ask him for permission to play with our own toys, and he would almost always say he "didn't feel like getting them out" like he was tired even though he did jack s**t all day. Come to think of it, he also basically forced me to stop playing with toys by putting my toy box in the garage. I was 9 and I was absolutely still playing with everything in there. But he claimed that he was "helping me out" by "getting it out of the way". I honestly cried. But because he said he was trying to help, I got called spoiled, and then he kept putting off bringing it back in the house. Guess where it is right now? Still in the f*****g garage. I'm 21 and I'm still angry about it. Edit: we had a house fire in 2018, and all my toys are fine. Less angry now. Image source: ToddToilet

#3

Image source: spook96, Tatiana Goskova Mum always called those mini sausages ‘little boys’ so naturally that’s what we called them too. It wasn’t until I was in uni and we had a party with kids party food I got called out on it... Thanks mum EDIT: Wow thanks for all the reply’s! Mums Australian, however I’m a New Zealander so it totally explains the bad communication over here! Haha glad I wasn’t the only one embarrassed by ‘little boys’.

#4

Image source: ThatGuyFromThat1Time, freepik Every year, a few days before Easter, my dad would sit us down as a family to brainstorm how we would catch the Easter Bunny. Night before Easter, he'd help us set the agreed-upon trap. When we went to bed, he'd spring the trap, nibble on the carrot (our bait), then leave a note for us from the "Easter Bunny" - either complimenting us on how clever our idea was, or saying how hard he had to work to escape it. How he wished he could stick around, but he had to go deliver candy to other kids. Signed "E.B." One year, he went so far as to put a white rag under the trap, with fishing line tied to it... and when he knew we were watching, he signaled my uncle (holding the other end of the line, out of our sight) to sprint away and haul in the line - so all we saw was a white dash fly out from the trap and around the corner of the house. When I got old enough to realize the EB wasn't real, I helped him run the ruse on my brother and sister. Didn't realize until years later that other families don't set fancy traps on Easter. I've just got a super cool dad.

#5

Image source: BatteryBonfire, zinkevych Cutting against the grain of this thread: hanging out with your parents a lot. My dad always made a point of spending time with us as kids, but after we became self-sufficient, we found ourselves just kinda getting along as friends. We never did any sort of rebellious stuff because of that. My dad even got into video games after a while, so we'd play co-op together when he got off work. My friends now hang out with my parents without me, and we invite them to come out with us when we do social things. I think the key was that they spent time with us, and only used authority to make us do things as a last resort (which admittedly won't work with everyone - but we were analytical and would go along with a soundly-worded argument).

#6

Image source: Kitcat1987, rawpixel.com My family are not comfortable around each other. Never any touching, kissing or cuddling. Any physical contact is forced and horribly awkward. No one also talks and any disagreements simmer for years with a grudging resentment. When I first starting dating my now husband I was shocked his family would just sit close to each other, like their legs would touch on the couch. Like not overly touchy, just normal, but not normal to me. They also spoke to each other if they were upset. I was quite envious.

#7

Image source: lordsamethstarr I was raised being told that because my parents gave me life, and provided me with food and shelter, that I owed them. I had to do a lot of chores, and my home life was strict. They picked my school classes, and would restrict me from seeing certain friends. If I didn't do a good job, I was considered disrespectful and rude for not being appreciative of all I had. I recall one time when I was in my early teens, I had to shovel snow. This was in central Alberta, where the snow could get waist high on me. After a couple of days of snowing and me shoveling, my arms and back were really sore from moving all the snow. We had a major snow storm, and I was required to shovel it all. After almost three hours outside, I could barely move my arms and I was feeling sick and dizzy. I wasn't done though, so I was not allowed to come back into the house for dinner because people who don't do their chores don't get to eat. I thought it was normal, and that other kids who weren't treated this way were spoiled and would grow up to be criminals. I sincerely believed I was lucky that my family loved me so much to be that strict so I could be ready for life. After running away from home I was adopted into a new family. They all did chores together, because a family helps each other. I figured out at that point that my parents had been guilting me into being a slave. I was raised to believe that I owed them for my life, but really they had to provide food, clothes, shelter, and everything because they are responsible for the children they brought into the world. I don't owe them anything for the basics. **Edit:** geez, this took off. I just want to clarify, I am not against doing chores. Chores teach children how to become independent and care for themselves. Chores help keep a household functioning. Very important stuff. In my case, the punishment for not succeeding in chores was severe, even if I was trying. I would have to get up from bed with fevers to clean dishes from meals I never even ate. I am not against the idea of kids shoveling snow, but working your kid until their arms give out, and not even letting them take a break to eat a family meal, all because they owe you for cooking dinner? A little extreme. I felt so guilty, like I was the most selfish 14 year old ever because my arms and back had given out after weeks of snow removal. That isn't normal or ok.

#8

Image source: Beretot, user18526052 Not being self-conscious about your naked body inside the house. Taking a shower and mom wants to ask something? She has always been welcome to get in the bathroom and ask, even with a glass shower box. Same goes for the other way around. If you need privacy (for, em, *business*), you can lock the door. It wasn't until I was a teen that it came up in conversations with my friends and they were disgusted I was seen naked by my mother somewhat frequently. That actually amused me - she changed my diapers for years and now we have to be embarrassed? Go figure ¯_(ツ)_/¯.

#9

Image source: anothestupidname, freepik I went to a catholic school (UK). Everyone was Irish. When I got into the real world, I was shocked by the lack of Irish people.

#10

Image source: DrJohnnySarcasm, diana.grytsku My father used to leave for weeks at a time without telling anyone. Mom always told us they "he's taking a vacation, he's stressed", so me and my brothers grew up thinking it was a completely normal thing to do. After I moved out, I had a pretty stressful period, so I just packed a backpack and went camping by myself, no phone, nothing to connect me to the outside world. I spent a week out of anyone's reach. Problem is, usually I'd call my mom every two days or so, except that one week. When I came back, my mother visited me and broke out crying, begging me to never do that again. I didn't understand, so I asked her "why would you worry so much, father would do this all the time and not once were you that concerned". As it turns out, my dad had attempted several times to [unalive] himself on those "vacations" (didn't go through because he didn't want to destroy our lives), and my mom was always wondering if he'd come back home or if she'd have to identify his body. They didn't want us, the kids, to find out how broken and dysfunctional our dad was, therefore making it seem normal to disappear every once in a while.

#11

I was just talking about this with someone the other day, but when I was younger my dad suffered with heart problems. I believe he had three heart attacks. They all happened at night and I remember getting up in the morning and my parents gone with just my Grandma there. I asked where they were, she said the hospital, and I'd be like "Oh, okay" and never thought it was weird or scary, it just seemed normal and he'd be back later that day or the next. I also found out at some point that my dad's biological father died at 28 from a heart attack, and his father at 30. That all happened before I was ten, but when I was ten he had a quadruple bypass surgery. Again, didn't really think it was weird or scary, didn't realize how serious it was. Honestly it wasn't until I was telling my friend all this the other day that I realized what a big deal it was. My Dad's surgery went well and he is now in his 70s, works out daily, lost weight, and hasn't had heart problems since. Image source: Kighla

#12

Image source: TerrifyingTurtle, drobotdean Complete silence on a road trip. No radio, no talking, nothing.

#13

Image source: Flynn_lives, user15285612 Always had a clean room. I told my mother that my best friend didn't have to clean his. Turns out they were hoarders.

#14

Image source: anon, freepik Eating out all the time. I didn't know until years later that I was eating out more than the average child of a low-class family. Way more.

#15

Image source: ShinigamiLuvApples, freepik For your parents to not have boundaries. At least, in the United States culture. My parents snooped through my things, constantly monitored me, and over-shared information about their marriage that I didn't need to know.

#16

I am adopted. From a young age, my parents were extremely open with me about the fact that I am adopted. So open, in fact, that I just started assuming that all kids must be adopted. My parents would always tell me the story about the day that they picked me up from the group children's home I had been staying at and I was officially theirs. I assumed that's where all babies come from... that their parents just go to a hospital/ children's home/cradle and pick them up, and viola! You have a kid. I was in for such a shock when I was 6 and one of my best friend's moms got pregnant and my mom had to explain to me how some parents have their kids biologically. Image source: KissedByFire2194

#17

Image source: Ezra_Blair, freepik Every adult being sad. I assumed that was an inevitable part of getting older and that I would embrace it when the time came.

#18

I had pretty bad anxiety as a child. In 5th grade I had a horrible teacher that always gave me panic attacks but I never knew what was going on when one happened. I remember my throat feeling weird and thinking I was about to throw up. Because of this I would be in the nurses office every two days and my mom eventually took me to a doctor and they said that everything was fine. I ended up thinking that it’s normal to feel extremely nervous before leaving my house and have random panic attacks at school. For the longest time my mom thought I was faking being sick to get out of school. I didn’t suffer from panic attacks at home. When I was in high school it was finally discovered that I had some sort of anxiety disorder and I finally got the help I needed. My mom feels bad now for accusing me of lying about feeling sick during panic attacks. It didn’t occur to her that mental health was a thing. Image source: ChaneI

#19

Image source: MightyCaseyStruckOut, freepik My parents didn't divorce. All of my closest friends' parents got divorced.

#20

Image source: SwiftieNewRomantics, armmypicca We used to go into mcdonalds and our father would tell us all the stuff people left on the trays when they left was free food and we f*****g went to town on it. I was 15 years old when I found out that wasn't normal.

#21

Image source: anon, krakenimages.com Apparently when I was a kid I used to pick up quarters on the street. My parents didn’t want me doing that so my dad told me to not pick up coins, because people put them in their butts. I didn’t use change for anything until I started driving at 16.

#22

I thought being mortally terrified of physical harm from your father was just how fathers are... turns out mine's just... not so great. Image source: anon

#23

When I turn my head too fast, I'll get a sharp pain on one side of my neck, my tongue will go numb, and my vision will go black on that side for a few seconds. I tried to ask my dad about it as a kid (he's a nurse, so I thought he might know why it did that) but I only had the vocabulary to describe it as "my neck hurts when I turn my head too fast" to which he responded "well, don't do that then." From then, I brushed it off as normal because he didn't seem terribly concerned. Fast forward around 15 years, and I'm hanging out with friends in college and accidentally turn my head too quickly. I make a noise/face/something to indicate that I'm in pain, come to, and complain about how I hate when that happens. My friends are clearly confused as to what just happened, so I try to explain. "You know when you turn your head too fast and your tongue goes numb and stuff?" I was met with blank stares until someone eventually tells me that no, they don't know, that's not normal. I'm still not *entirely* sure what causes it, but it sounds an awful lot like Neck-Tongue Syndrome. Image source: br0itskatie

#24

Image source: naomi_is_watching, katemangostar My family kisses on the mouth. It's not considered sexual. Turns out, not everyone feels that way.

#25

Image source: GIfuckingJane, vera_agency Parents who didn't want me to have friends and resented my friendships.