40 People Share Why A Relative Was Kicked Out From Their Family

We like to think that blood is thicker than water when it comes to family. Therefore, by default, we have people that accept and support us. Most of the time this works great because humans are social creatures and essentially need a ‘village’.  However, some family members go against the grain and create toxic environments around them. If their behaviour is extremely unacceptable or prolonged, this may even provoke the family to ditch that individual from future family gatherings. Below is a collection of stories from Redditors explaining why their families chose to ostracise a relative.

#1 Me- cuz I'm the only deaf member in the entire family and the only deaf guy in the town as well so there was almost no asl beside mom, aunt and older brother.

Image source: Akurbanexplorer, Kevin Malik Even so we didn't really talk like a family. So I grew up with minimal sign language, no asl for my bday, Christmas, Thanksgiving etc. I now see holidays as pointless and waste of time. My mom only FaceTimed me once in 13 years and that was to find out where my cousin were in the store I was with him at the time but yet FaceTimed my cousin and older brother frequently. Go figures. If you've got a deaf family member, it helps a lot learning asl and spending time with them. Don't leave them out.

#2 My uncle. He is the stereotypical loser, racist homophobe who think gas chambers never existed and that homosexuals Jewish people secretly rule the world. No wonder nobody wants to speak to him.

Image source: lectxr, Andrea Piacquadio

#3 My uncle got his son's girlfriend pregnant. We've always hated the guy for reasons I won't get into but this was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Image source: ThePhabtom4567, freestocks

#4 Me. Because I'm an atheist. Entire family is Southern Baptist.

Image source: ProbablyABore, Karolina Kaboompics

#5 My uncle Greg. His Alzheimer’s dementia is so bad he doesn’t recognize anyone in his family anymore and visiting just scares and confuses him because it’s out of his routine. It’s really sad because we do miss him. It’s sad to know the next time we see him won’t be until his funeral.

Image source: stevebobeeve, Matthias Zomer

#6 Me. Because I cut ties with my parents, brother, and sister in law because they are toxic, manipulative people who were destroying my mental health. I have been no contact for years and have not missed any of them even once.

Image source: Spawnof88

#7 My uncle. He stole tens of thousands of dollars from my grandmother while she was dying of cancer, defaulted on business agreements with my father, and then disappeared. There’s a lot more to this, but for the sake of brevity and not being *too* specific, we’ll leave it at that.

Image source: Gamecat235, Lukas

#8 Me. I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and most of my family are witnesses so when I decided I no longer wanted anything to do with the cult I was basically cut off. Mother does small talk even though I’d prefer complete silence from her, brother is an a**hat/POS so I don’t bother with him. Dad is the only one I have no problem with/he has no problem with talking to.

Image source: Total_Gur4367, MART PRODUCTION

#9 Me. I used to try to help everyone when they needed it because I could afford to. Six years ago my wife had a ruptured brain aneurysm and two strokes. I needed help taking care of her.

Image source: Faithful-Tired, Marcus Aurelius I never got the first offer of any help so on top of my twelve hour each day job I take care of her by myself. I think often of how I gave up so much for everyone else and got treated this way. They all have get togethers and vacations and things we never get invited to because she really is a handful. We just spend time with each other and our grown kids when we can and make the best of it. I do really get upset though because I am so tired and really could use a break but it is what it is. Thank you for listening.

#10 It was me. Once my mom passed away I wasn't spoken to for over 20 years. My crime? Refusing to be a racist bigot filled with hate for anything not white, straight and Christian. I am happy with their decision.

Image source: SnooBeans5364, RDNE Stock project

#11 I'm the only one who talks to my cousin. She came out as pansexual a few years ago (her spiteful ex actually outed her toher parents), and sadly my Asian family is extremely homophobic. Sadly I'm her only support and ally.

Image source: victoriachan365, Monstera Production

#12 Me, I'm the one relative. I choose not to keep in touch with my family, because I don't want someone constantly asking me for money or to take care of their children.

Image source: DontYuckMyYum, Andrea Piacquadio

#13 I stopped speaking to my older sister because she is a holier than thou judgmental miserable b***h. I have spoken to her once in 4 years and that was when I answered the phone in my Mom’s ICU room. I told her if she wanted to say goodbye she should get there. She did not. Mom died a few days later and as far as I’m concerned my older sister died that day too. I will never speak to her again.

Image source: Tattooedbitchface, Alexander Grey

#14 Me. I objected to being bullied by my sister. They all said I was too sensitive and that she had the right to bully me because she's the older one. I stopped speaking to them all once I was told that I don't deserve to be treated with respect.

Image source: SkepchickGamer

#15 Me. They kept stealing from me, using me for free food, transportation, labor, treating me like s**t, and being patronizing as f**k. I cut them all out.

My found family loves me very much, and treats me with respect. They've never stolen from me or try to use me to get stuff or do stuff for them. My daughter is growing up with loving, supportive people who nurture and protect her, instead of a bunch of grifters who would exploit her as a resource for money and labor while gaslighting her into believing she's incompetent and stupid. Image source: Sekmet19

#16 Me. I’m city. They’re country. I’d say, “That’s cool!” They’d say, “That’s weird.” I’m queer. They don’t like that. So we don’t talk!

Image source: RadioSupply, Ivan Samkov

#17 My aunt and uncle. After my mom died they took my grandma, got power of attorney over her life and wiped out her accounts within minutes of moving out of my dad’s house. Bought all their family members iPads for Christmas and let my grandma die in the garage in the middle of winter. I don’t care that they stole my inheritance—it wasn’t much—but I really miss my grandma to this day.

Image source: drinkslinger1974, Ron Lach

#18 Me. I got sick with Crohns non diabetic LRP and can't walk. It's crazy how fast your friends and family abandon you when you can't go out like you used to.

Image source: Agile-Stick2803, Marcus Aurelius Being called a hermit only salts the wound. Went from a national qualified runner and athlete to being sick is apparently a choice. Some of my family say that if I were closer to God, I wouldn't be so sick. If only it was that easy. It wasn't even like it happened over a long period, either. Prior to 2020, I was walking , working ,eating, and socializing. I'm lucky I have a saint for a wife, so I manage. It just surprised me how fast everyone dropped me. Some people have no idea how to deal with illness when it affects their loved ones and friends.

#19 Me. My sister went public with the abuse that was done to us as kids and the family members who did it in 2022. At age 13 and again at 15, she did try and get police involved, but the mother of the cousin that was harming us was friends with many people in the department (and is married to one now) so my sisters story was never believed. We suffered very awful abuse for roughly 6 years. My mother was informed, an aunt, our grandmother, and police, yet our mom still took us to that aunts house so she could enjoy her time with her husband without her 2 daughter around. We never received justice. Today, our family has shunned not only her, but I as well. They still have ALL of the abusers in their close circle and to this day no one from the family believes us despite injuries being shown over the years. My sister is now 5 months clean from her d**g addiction as a result of our upbringing. I turned out alright I guess currently in therapy and working through everything. But yeah f**k my family. ?.

Image source: Shining-Crown21

#20 My aunt. She tried to take the car my grandmother left in her will to me from me. This happened literal minutes after my grandmother passed. We were still in the room with my grandmother. .

Image source: PubbleBubbles, Pixabay

#21 I'm that family member. I called CPS on my fam, so I get it.

Image source: Wide_Cow7653, Yan Krukau

#22 My brother. Married a lunatic and was an a*****e to my mom during her chemo. The b****s mom had the audacity to make a comment about how much my mom attended church at her memorial service and asked the preacher to reconsider doing the ceremony. Hopefully their god forgives them, because I never will.

Image source: ShapeAppropriate6170, RDNE Stock project

#23 It's me. Im dating a guy (I'm a guy), and the last thing anyone in my Catholic/conservative family can do is talk, so I'm building my own life.

I've learned it's better that way anyway. Image source: WhoDeysaThinkin

#24 My aunt Pam. At some point she started hearing voices telling her to hurt family members. I don't have a ton of details, but I know she lives in an apartment on a property managed by some kind of mental health facility.

Image source: Original_Barnacle359, Pavel Danilyuk

#25 I have a really large family. We found out one brother was sexually assaulting our baby sister from when she was three until she was 14. She had told my mom. Mom did nothing. That brother has been pushed out by the 12 of us. My parents are dead to us too.

Image source: Patient_Yam4747, Iurii Laimin

#26 It was me, and it was because of my drinking.....

Image source: mezz7778, Pavel Danilyuk Coming up on 5 years sober, and it took 3 years of sobriety just to get invited to Christmas...so next Christmas will only be like the second I've gotten the invite to in 15 years or so... Took my sister aside last weekend to give her an apology for all that time, and sorry that I was never an uncle to her kids, they're all grown now, so can't change that, but I am sorry the bottle was more important than everything, and everyone during that time, I lost everything... A lot of what, and who I lost I'll never be able to get back in my life.

#27 My sister. She went religious zealot on us, especially against my brother who’s gay, and we all sided with him. It was crazy. She was completely normal one day, falls in love with a Christian worship leader, then the next day she believes our brother is going to hell. What a hill to die on.

Image source: Creepy-Total8241, Arina Krasnikova

#28 My mom is the person in her family, but it's not because she's a bad person or she has issues with substance abuse. The majority of her family just doesn't like who she loves. Her family is very white, and my dad, brother, and I are black. I have a Latino uncle, but they're fine with him. Some of my family don't care, namely a couple cousins, but I haven't spoken with any of my aunts or uncles in almost 16 years.

Image source: ph3nth3n3rd, Good Faces Agency

#29 Me because I removed myself from the cycle of using me as the black sheep. It turns out I do have a line and they danced across it.

Image source: Dazzling_Living_4362

#30 My Aunt. When one of my uncles passed away my other aunts and uncles (besides this one aunt) decided to give their piece of the inheritance to the one uncle who basically sacrificed his whole life to take care of the uncle that passed. The uncle that passed got into a horrible motorcycle accident at the age of 20. He was paralyzed from the neck down and could not eat on his own, nor go to the bathroom and he could barely speak. And on top of this he would wake up every day not remembering anything past the day he got into the accident. My other uncle had to explain to him and comfort him every day with the reality of what happened to him. From 20 until he passed in his late 40s my other uncle cared for him. This one Aunt did not want to give her part of the inheritance and took legal action and was horrible to the whole family because she wanted what she wanted. It is a shame.

Image source: kanamatic

#31 Me. My mother is perpetually miserable, has narcissistic tendencies and is an emotional vampire.

Me putting up healthy boundaries amounted to betrayal in her eyes. As a result, she told me not to come to her funeral when she dies. Say less. Have a nice life. POS. Image source: Coach_BombaySapphire

#32 Sadly, it's rapidly becoming the Trump supporting BIL and his family. We don't really care about their politics, but they insist on pushing them on everyone, inserting them into conversations etc. They've ruined family holidays over it bc they explode if anyone ever tries to point out that facts don't align with their opinions, and that words like "socialist" don't mean what they keep insisting they mean.

Image source: BookLuvr7

#33 My cousin was involved in organized crime and put his family through hell. We still kept him around for some reason. He was the charming, handsome, funny cousin. Everybody loved him.

Image source: bakstruy25, cottonbro studio Our grandma confronted him over him doing cocaine in the bathroom at our little cousins birthday. He snapped at her and viciously attacked her, breaking her nose, jaw, and two ribs. He then ran out of the house. My uncle and dad and cousin found him a few days later and beat him with an inch of his life, and then nobody ever spoke to him again.

#34 Me and it's because I'm transgender. The only members of my (large) biological family who will acknowledge that I exist are my half great uncle and his wife, my mom, and my gay cousin. They literally pretend like I don't exist. They can go to hell though, I'm better off without them.

Image source: witwickan, Malcolm Garret

#35 Recently my dad. He slept with my sister’s fiancé (M). My sister is pregnant.

Image source: DucktapeCorkfeet, Ketut Subiyanto

#36 I’m pretty sure my brother has k*lled people, among other serious (maybe more serious) crimes. Legally there’s nothing I can do. What evidence I know the police and FBI also know. I have a restraining order against him and moved as far away as I can. One day he’ll finally go down for a crime and there’ll be a Netflix special on him and they’ll ask why the family was complicit as if we could stop any of this.

Image source: 3andahalfbath, Kindel Media

#37 My moms brother lol he cheated on his wife (we still talk to her) They divorced, he kidnapped their 2 kids and took them to Singapore for years, then took them on a house boat off the coast of Mexico for a while, and meanwhile was scrutinizing my aunt for “being a bad mom”, Shes a wonderful cheerful cute Swiss woman.Because we still talk to her, he refuses to talk to anyone. We don’t really care.

She has full custody of the kids now in Switzerland :). Image source: Nipplefrisk

#38 Me! Because I escaped to the opposite coast 50 years ago, and the *one* that isn’t dead is on my permanent no-talk sh**list.

I am so happy to have left this family behind. The only one I cared about was my mom, and I know she envied (not in a bad way) the fact that I chose freedom over conformity. I wish she had, too. But she was trapped. If this resonates with anyone, remember that *you don’t have to love emotional abusers.* **Run away!**. Image source: seaboardist

#39 That‘s me. Because I was abused from age 11 to 17 by my sisters husband (18 years older than me) and after 40 years of playing it down to myself and keeping silent (and becoming an alcoholic, and several years of therapy) I finally broke my silence. Shame of the family, where everything that‘s not perfect has to be swept under the rug.

Image source: sanjasue

#40 An aunt who mismanaged grandma's estate & refused to return the money she stole until one of her sisters sued her for it. Aunt maintains her sisters were "just being mean" but now none of her 4 sisters speak to her.

Image source: kat_rob