“Made Me Rethink The Whole Relationship”: 40 Gifts From Partners That Were Offensive

Gift-giving is often considered a thoughtful way to express love and appreciation, but what happens when a gift reveals that your partner might not know you as well as you thought? One Reddit user posed this intriguing question: "What is the gift your partner gave you that made you realize they don’t know you at all?" The responses poured in, ranging from hilariously misguided to downright baffling.

These stories highlight how gift-giving can sometimes reveal the gaps in understanding between partners. While the thought is usually what counts, these examples serve as a humorous reminder that knowing your partner’s likes and dislikes can go a long way in making gifts truly meaningful.. Here are some of the most memorable answers.

#1

Image source: genxindifferance, Denny Müller/unsplash (not the actual photo) My (ex) wife got me one of those candy bar bouquets for my birthday. You know the ones...different candy bars glued to sticks, then arranged in a "bouquet". Popular at Walmart and gas stations. One.....it was 2 weeks *after* my birthday Two.....I'm diabetic That was one of the last straws before I left.

#2

Image source: TheWisePlinyTheElder, mostafa meraji/unsplash (not the actual photo) He took me to the mall the day of my birthday to pick out my own gift, then bought himself something instead. Edit: we divorced three months later.

#3

Image source: z0mbie_boner, Maria Lin Kim/unsplash (not the actual photo) This isn’t the gift that made me realize, but it should have been. Our first Christmas together, I got him a custom-made, 3D printed action figure of himself. I designed matching packaging, and paid extra for the version you could record a message on, and recorded what he once told me would be his “entrance music”. He got me groceries. Literally groceries. And they sat unrefrigerated under the tree for two days before I opened them in front of my family, who knew all about the cool action figure I spend weeks on. Humiliating. Took longer than it should have, but we are no longer together lol.

#4

Image source: trash_heap_witch, Karolina Grabowska/unsplash (not the actual photo) My ex bought a bunch of p**n DVDs. Yes, this was in the age of the internet. Because I assume the p***o DVD market is grateful for any and all purchases, they included a free mini bottle of massage oil. I got that bottle of massage oil as my birthday present. So that I could give him a massage. Fun bonus: when I kicked him out and his mom came to collect his things, I put the DVDs right at the top of the box.

#5

Image source: kayehareehs, Joe Cleary/unsplash (not the actual photo) A kitten for my birthday. I’m allergic to cats….

#6

Image source: The_Sibyl, Castorly Stock/pexels (not the actual photo) Okay, get ready: Ex boyfriend comes to pick me up to go to his apartment for a “special evening”. During the car ride (almost an hour) he goes on and on and ON about that special evening that he has planned out and how he has a surprise for me that I will never forget. Well, both the special evening and the unforgettable surprise was that he had shaven his balls. He was hoping for it to be this whole thing. The worst part? I like my men hairy.

#7

Image source: BurritoBum90, RDNE Stock project/pexels (not the actual photo) For my birthday one year, in August mind you, my husband went to the local GROCERY STORE and got me a gift basket that said “Happy Father’s Day” (you know, the holiday in June… for fathers… I’m a child free woman in my 30’s).

#8

Image source: purpleowlchai, karlyukav/freepik (not the actual photo) When we first met, Pokémon was a thing so he got me a size small jigglypuff shirt and said it would motivate me to lose weight.

#9

Image source: Nice_Violinist9736, Getty Images/unsplash (not the actual photo) When he said s*x was a gift ? then complained when I didn’t accept his idea because he said that I wanted it and so he was finally going to give it to me only because I wanted it.

#10

Image source: SpiraledChaos, Terry Granger/unsplash (not the actual photo) Omg finally a chance to tell my tale of woe. I had a partner who would give me random gifts. Now I know what you are thinking, 'that's so sweet'. No. No. All of the gifts were completely random or objectively FB ad garbage. This story comes from more than a year into our relationship. One day, I opened my door to find a massive box from Nuts.com. Now I have nothing against Nuts.com, they make a good product, but the items I received from them couldn't have been more face-palm. 1. Almonds (I have a fairly severe allergy) 2. Dried Mango (I loath mango) 3. Dried Pineapple (also allergic) 4: 1lb of Chocolate (I am a type 1 diabetic) I gave almost all of the gift away. The next gift he gave me was a pound of bacon from my local supermarket. He left it on my porch in the dead of summer. I wasn't home. I came home to stinking, completely melted, and rotting bacon on my porch.

#11

Image source: Halloweenie85, EyeEm/freepik (not the actual photo) A State Farm mug (his mom was a state farm agent,) and it was full of little chocolate bars. I am SEVERELY allergic to chocolate and he knew this. He didn’t even buy the chocolate or the mug. It was a part of a bunch of free gifts his mom’s job were giving away to customers and he swiped one.

#12

Image source: Wonderful-Fishing857, kovalnadiya/freepik (not the actual photo) My husband of quite a few years bought me a meat slicer for Christmas one year. I have never in my whole entire life either needed or wanted to slice meat with a meat slicer. I was so upset and embarrassed so I hid it from my parents who were there with us. I returned it of course and bought myself a Kindle instead.

#13

A Nintendo DS. With only games that he wanted to play. When we broke up, he took it with him. Image source: IvyKingslayer

#14

Image source: Peyprika, freepik (not the actual photo) My bf gave me a bath bomb and a pink yeti wine cup for Christmas… I staunchly never take baths, I’ve never owned anything pink in my adult life, and I’d never had wine at that point. When I finally said “hey wth none of these reflect anything about me” he admitted it was a regift from his mother ? no shame either! He thought it was better than nothing! It wasn’t!

#15

Image source: nacklemary, Photo By: Kaboompics.com/unsplash (not the actual photo) One Christmas, my ex husband got me a Home Alone Pop Doll and a handful of those little brain-teaser puzzles you get in the toy section at Barnes and Noble. We hadn't ever watched that movie together, I have no affinity for it, and i dont even collect those dolls. And I famously hate those little metal puzzles. I was devastated and exploded into tears. I had spent a lot of money and thought on a beautiful watch to replace his that had broken. He doubled down and insisted he had put a lot of thought into the gifts and was furious with me for being "ungrateful". This was just one of many red flags and i am happy to say I wised up and we divorced in 2020 and I am now engaged to someone whose gifts make me tear up because they know me so well.

#16

Image source: toriaa02, Getty Images/unsplash (not the actual photo) A haircut. HIS haircut, specifically. We were long distance and he had me cut his dreads off on my birthday weekend when I came to visit (I am not a hair stylist or even close). When asked why he didn’t even get me a card, that’s when he called the haircut my gift. Never once did I say that I didn’t like his hair or suggest a haircut so it really made zero sense to me.

#17

Image source: apricotdrugs, Snappr/unsplash (not the actual photo) As a teen, my then-bf gave us a date to Buffalo Wild Wings.... I was a vegetarian ??.

#18

My ex of maaaaaany years ago gave me cooking lessons. I was 20 and he was 30…I had ZERO interest in cooking at that time (trust me, my mama tried) and was LIVID. His mom was a SAHM to 6 kids and I always felt like that’s what he wanted. My 20 year old feminist self was NOT amused. We broke up 1 month later. Image source: ClumsyPotter

#19

Image source: variegatedwanderer, Curated Lifestyle/unsplash (not the actual photo) My husband threw me a surprise party and I hated it so much. I cried when everyone popped out and did the whole “surprise!!” thing. Everyone thought I was crying because I’m a sentimental person (which I am) but I cried because I was so upset that this what my evening was going to be. I hate surprises.

#20

An argument. they told me i was too vague (even tho i made a list w visual aids, just in case since they were a visual person) with pricepoints all over the board, and gift ideas that were free (e.g. massage, read me a story, etc.). they also then said it was my fault for being too picky, despite being open to different ideas. then they said it was because we were tight on money (and then proceeded to come home w a new motorcycle days later). this was all within the same week of the same year. they were surprised when i left. Image source: garlicmashedpotatas

#21

Image source: True_Visit7613, sarahjgualtieri1/freepik (not the actual photo) I once had a ex give me peanut butter chocolate from sees candy for Christmas… I’m deathly allergic to peanuts.

#22

Image source: Hes9023, Micaela Parente/unsplash (not the actual photo) My ex put one of his old tshirts in a box then complained that I was materialistic when I was upset.

#23

This is going to sound dramatic to some but recently my partner of 8+ years called me all excited hyping up how he got me a gift that I’m going to love. Comes home and hands me a can of dairy cold foam. I don’t consume dairy in any form. This made me open my eyes a lot and made me realize he genuinely doesn’t know me nor gives a s**t to. Image source: xkhb

#24

Image source: adios-perrito, Sandra Seitamaa/unsplash (not the actual photo) A waist trainer so I would lose weight.

#25

Image source: bearyweek, wirestock/freepik (not the actual photo) My ex always got me jewellery in silver. Every. Single. Time. I’d mention I don’t really wear silver, and he’d say he’d remember for next time. But then I would get… more silver jewellery. Not even like nicer silver stuff, but like the cheap stuff that would get gross quickly.

#26

A box of Slim Jims for Christmas. We’d been dating 5 yrs. I spent over $100 on his presents despite not having a job at the time. He’s a trust fund baby. Yeah so that felt like s**t. ETA: not that money determines the worth of the gift. I would have been sooo happy with something thoughtfully homemade (in fact, would have preferred it). But I got him merch from his favorite sports teams and stuff for his favorite hobbies… annnnd he got me a box of Slim Jims ?. Image source: Ok-Patience-4764

#27

My ex got me a garden hose and sprinkler for mother's day one year.... we didn't have a yard. Image source: findyourhappy401

#28

He got me a top saying 'I have the best husband ever', a book of date ideas and an ugly heart shaped jewellery box for Christmas. He had typed into amazon 'present for my wife'. When I asked why he didn't get me a book as I love reading, he snapped " I don't know what books you like". We had been together 9 years. This was Xmas 2024. We are now divorcing. Just one of the many small cuts. FYI my presents to him were thoughtful. And the book of date ideas had many ideas I had suggested and he had said no to as they were too boring. Image source: dinocheese

#29

My exhusband picked out the ugliest engagement ring, he was very focused on it being flashy(it was three big princess cut diamonds that came out to 3carats and sat very high in the setting), instead of thinking about my style and what I’d actually like to wear everyday. It was very gaudy By contrast, the “engagement”(in quotations because we aren’t going to actually get married, just live in sin) ring my current partner gave me is an aquamarine stone, with small blue sapphires around it. 10/10 no notes. Image source: punkrawkchick

#30

Ex-bf gave me an engraved stone vase that was originally intended as a gift for his mother (he forgot that I was the one who took him to the store so he could purchase it). I took one look at it and told him that it wasn't my taste but his mother's and that he was welcome to give it to the person that it was originally intended for. He obviously didn't realize that I would remember how he obtained the vase and he wanted to say that he got me "something." I told him to keep the vase and gave him his freedom after dropping him at the Amtrak station to go visit his mommy with the vase in tow. Afterwards it was like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders. Image source: Affectionate-Low5301

#31

Well my ex gave me Reese’s for Christmas (it was probably the only thing he remembered about me besides my family). Just that and nothing else. Whereas his mom got me a cute cup and adorable socks! I miss his mom more than him lol Also his sister :) When he broke up with me, she apologized, said that I deserved better, that her brother was an idiot, and cussed his a*s out lol And she’s not wrong. I definitely deserved better than him. Image source: Orchidlove456

#32

My sons dad always bought me jewellery. Which is sweet but he was very much 'I am alpha man and women are lesser'. So no matter how many times I told him not to. He still bought me jewellery. Usually like a silver necklace with a star, I had one with a horse and a bracelet. I don't wear any form of jewellery at all. I've kept them all, and I keep the horse one because he said it was from my son on mother's day (my son was about 4 months old). He was the kind of person where you would sit and listen to them talking about their day and venting and you'd have a back and forth conversation but then the minute I spoke about me he would interrupt and cut me off mid sentence after about 30 seconds. He was just never interested in me as a person, only what I could do for him. I think about the difference between him and my other ex sometimes. He knew me really, for our first Xmas together he got me a box that was filled with boost (the energy drink), 3 bottles of tomato ketchup and a mass effect hoodie. That's the kind of s**t I want. Image source: Thelazyzoologist

#33

Image source: Highandhardcouple, Daihana Monares/unsplash (not the actual photo) Earrings. My ears weren’t pierced.

#34

3 years and living together—for my birthday he got me/us tickets to HIS favorite artist that I literally never ever listened to. He got tickets for his twin brother and childhood friend to come too. I told him the gift didn’t really have anything to do with my interests and he got defensive at first, saying he thought it was a nice idea as something to do together for an activity. He later admitted he wanted an excuse to drop hundreds on them and didn’t have gift ideas for me . Was the last straw in feeling like he was in his own world and I ended things soon after that. Image source: groovinandmovinnn

#35

My ex bought himself a new top of the line Kindle just before my birthday. He said I should get one, but I had no interest, I liked my nice books. On my birthday he gifted me his old one, all beaten up and scratched. Image source: GraphicDesignMonkey

#36

Image source: catsandcoconuts, saragoldsmith/flickr (not the actual photo) My dad once gave my mom a toilet seat cover.

#37

An ex once gifted me a bright pink tshirt, with a dog on the front, and it said, ‘I didn’t fart, my butt blew you a kiss’. We are middle aged. That was promptly donated. Image source: in_sweet_corn

#38

My ex gave me a Pandora charm of a ghost strung along a normal necklace chain. I don’t wear jewelry, and I only like very dainty stuff if I do. But he thought the ghost was cute and didn’t understand that they’re bracelet charms ? He also gave me a skateboard deck (I don’t skateboard, he did) and a booster box of Pokemon cards (I don’t collect them, he did). Both of those mysteriously stayed in his possession after the breakup lol. My high school boyfriend also gave me the lovely birthday gift of leaving me on the week of my birthday to do a road trip with the boys, and then going to a strip Club on my actual birthday and not calling me. Ahhh, good times. My partner now, however, got me a custom made allergy friendly chocolate cake for my birthday + a little crocheted bee keychain. The guy knows me ❤️. Image source: kinfloppers

#39

Image source: treedecor, Getty Images/unsplash (not the actual photo) My ex got me the "gift" of absolutely nothing and then called me crazy for getting upset with him over it. Oh and this was on my birthday btw.

#40

Image source: ZealousidealSense523, KamranAydinov/freepik (not the actual photo) My ex bought me Tupperware, the kind with lids attached. After watching an infomercial about them, commenting he thought they were cool, and me saying I didn’t like them. ?‍♀️.