35 Times People Encountered Unfair Double Standards And Spoke Up
For most of us our exposure to double standards starts from a young age. It begins with our parents when Mum gets emotional and Dad gets loud, but as children, we were heavily criticised for showing too much emotion and often punished for verbalising any dissent.
We are so conditioned to put up with these double standards that it usually continues into adulthood. Sadly, it takes us a second to even recognise it happening around us or in our daily lives. However, folks recently got together to talk about instances where they have dealt with double standards in their life and it’s an eye-opening read. Scroll below for a list of these inequalities that are overlooked but really should be called out more often so that we can live in a society that is fair and equal.
I saw a post on a Facebook group I’m in recently. It was a selfie of a mother with her little boy in the backseat eating a pudding cup with no spoon and she had captioned it “making sure he’s making his future girlfriends happy” or something along those lines.
I was disgusted by it, my boyfriend laughed. He tried to tell me I was being stuck up and a prude about it. I asked him if I was a father posting a picture of his daughter eating a popsicle and captioned it similar about making future boyfriends happy would you feel the same way? He looked like I slapped him in his face but he instantly got what I was saying.
Sexualizing children in any capacity is gross af and it even happens to little boys. People just need to do better and let kids simply be kids without putting sexual undertones to it. So f*****g weird.
I solely raised my daughter as a single father from the time she was a year old until she was almost six when I married my wife. The number of people who have asked about my daughter’s mother just to reply with “Oh, she must have had PPD.” or “There must be a mental illness involved.” or “Maybe she will come around in a few years.” is absolutely staggering. Like no man, she just decided she wanted to go party instead of being a mom to our child. No child support. No financial or emotional contribution. Nothing. Hell, I couldn’t even get a copy of my daughter’s health insurance card when her old one expired because “I wasn’t on the paperwork” despite the fact that I was the one who filled out the paperwork for it at the hospital the day after she was born.
It’s infuriating knowing full well that had the roles been reversed, and I’d have been the one to leave, I’d 100% instantly be considered a deadbeat father.
If I cancel an appointment, I get charged $50 (like a doctor or therapist).
If I’m walking out the door and they call and cancel, no consequences.
#4 Body positivity really only applies to women. Calling a man a fatass vs a woman will garner very different responses. Also making fun of the size of a man’s member is a lot more acceptable than making fun of a woman for her attributes( I don’t agree with either, it’s just my observation)
#5 If I don’t wear makeup to work, and fix my hair and wear feminine outfits, I am asked multiple times if I am feeling okay that day. I am dressed professionally in pants and a shirt, with my hair brushed and my face washed, just like ALL the men here. Why are my requirements different? It’s not on paper anywhere, but it is implied every single day.
#6 I gotta give you 2 weeks notice ima quit, but you can fire me at any point? Nah fam
#7 Female genital mutilation is illegal in most Western countries (as it absolutely should be) but half the US and 25% of Canada STILL support mutilating boys. Mutilating anyone’s genitals should be illegal.
Image source: beefstewforyou
#8 If you manage your disability well, despite the difficulties it presents, you’re then not considered “disabled enough” to qualify for any of the social care support you most likely need to continue to manage your disability and live well.
#9 We live in an extroverts world.
In many Western cultures, being outgoing, sociable, and outspoken is often celebrated and encouraged. It’s seen as the norm to want to chat, network, and be the life of the party. But when it comes to introverts who may crave quiet, solitude, or just less social interaction, the script flips.
It’s socially acceptable to nudge the quiet person in the room and say, “Why don’t you talk more?” But imagine telling a chatty person, “Can you be quiet for a bit?” It would be considered rude or offensive.
This double standard underscores a deeper societal bias towards extroversion. The noise and buzz of constant interaction are often valued more than the quiet, reflective spaces introverts thrive in. It’s like we’re saying one way of interacting with the world is better than the other, when in reality, both have their strengths and should be equally respected. In a world that can’t stop talking, sometimes we forget the power of silence and introspection. – An extroverted introvert.
#10 Pretending to take a cigarette break is more accepted than taking an actual break. And not just at work. Like, it’s weird if I take five minutes to go outside, decompress, and breathe in some fresh air. But if I inhale toxic fumes from a burning plant while I do that, it’s fine.
#11 women get a pass for being predatory.
#12 I’m American (so I’m not sure if this happens in other countries) and Christian people when they sit at your dinner table and do the guilt thing right before you eat saying “Wait, aren’t we going to pray first?” And even the non religious people look guilty and pretend to pray. It took me until my 30’s to realize the double standard if I were another religion and sat at their table and insisted we pray to my god, they likely wouldn’t take so kindly to it. Now I say “you’re welcome to pray but I’m going to go ahead and start eating”
Image source: Pluckyplatypus26
#13 That in the US, disabled people need more money to afford healthcare, but they aren’t legally allowed to have more than like $2000-$2500 in assets if they’re on disability. And it’s less if they’re married
#14 We feel so so so compassionate toward disabled people, but our policies require them to live life in deep poverty, with s****y medical care, while we run around saying how every life is precious. Sure.
#15 When Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer she is “artistic” or “edgy.” When i do it, I’m “drunk” and “no longer allowed at Home Depot.”
#16 People are encouraged to reach out and ask for help when they are struggling with mental health – but still stigmatised if they have mental illness.
#17 I’m expected to make it through an entire workday while it’s snowing outside, while children are allowed to stay home and drink hot chocolate and go sledding. Absolutely unfair (I’m 29).
#18 This is probably small potatoes, but it’s kinda crazy that people are comfortable demanding height minimums on dating sites and just in conversation. Quite a few tinder profiles say ‘must be over 6ft’. It’s the only demand on a physical attribute that is commonly casually stated. It’s totally okay to feel that way, but it seems kinda rough to remind every short guy swiping that he has limited options. I’m over 6th and it still kinda pissed me off to see it. I have short friends. I always imagine the painful little ping they’d feel any time they saw it.
#19 People get pissed off when min wage increases but say f**k all about billionaires avoiding taxes
Image source: akxCIom
#20 If you make any mistake with money like overdraft, miss a payment, forget to pay tax, you get royally screwed and have to often pay even more in penalties and get no say in the matter. But if the banks, business, or insurance f***s up they owe you nothing and you often have to fight to get what you owe and often still lose out in money and time
Image source: ybetaepsilon
#21 Casual racism against certain skin colors. It’s never okay to discriminate against someone based on something out of their control.
Being a morning person and getting up early to get a bunch of stuff done, then going to bed early, is considered virtuous and mature. Being a night person and staying up late to get stuff done, then sleeping late the next day, is considered disorganized and lazy. Even if you did the same amount of work and slept the same number of hours.
I have colleagues who work 6am to 3pm, and people constantly chirp about how efficient they are. But when someone at my office asked if they could work 11 am to 8 pm because that fit better with their body’s energy cycle, they were mocked for wanting to oversleep like a teenager, and the request was denied.
#23 Attractive and popular people can get away with some foul s**t compared to the average person
#24 The double standard between women, especially teenage girls, being fans of things, and men being fans of things.
It’s deemed as somewhat normal and almost to be expected than men go absolutely mental over sport, especially things like football, to the point that when there are football games on the local police are usually on standby to deal with the riots and fights that usually happen. And that’s just kind of seen as part of it and to be expected and is just people being passionate.
On the other hand, if you get a group of teenage girls getting a bit excited over like, idk, a BTS concert or a Taylor Swift show or something, suddenly that’s deemed weird and stupid and they get dragged for it.
It’s literally the same thing. The latter is also far less disruptive yet is the thing that is always demonised. It’s not a new thing either it goes back as far as like The Beatles and Elvis where it was just passed off as ‘ridiculous hysteria” meanwhile you’ve got a brexit geezer going absolutely feral because Manchester United lost.
Lowkey pisses me off a lot that anything women and teenage girls like is demonised yet things like sport get a free pass.
#25 Racism against white people. Idc bring on the downvotes it’s so true.
Image source: Aggravating_Fox34
#26 Bullying is looked down upon, but so are the victims.
#27 Men being abused physically by women is funny. For instance, the trailer for “Anyone but You” had Sydney Sweeny sucker punch her love interest in the balls. If the man sucker punched her in the privates, I doubt anyone would’ve laughed.
Image source: dayofthedead204
#28 The justice system. There’s definitely multiple justice systems depending on things like class and race. While it’s definitely noticed, it’s not like anything is actually being done about it so by practical standards it goes unnoticed.
#29 Poor people get audited if they fail to report a few hundred dollars of taxes, while multi-billion dollar companies technically operate outside of the country and pay nothing.
#30 If a dad gets pizza or fast food for his kids instead of cooking a meal, he’s considered the “fun dad”. If a mom gets pizza or fast food for her kids instead of cooking a meal, she’s considered a “lazy mom”
#31 Rich people don’t face consequences for crimes like normal people at all. Fines were designed to punish the poor and let the rich get away with disregard for society. Bail was also designed this way because it means your ability to get out of jail is dependent on the size of your bank account. People should not be fined for crimes or be able to get out of them with money period.
#32 The way we view emotions.
If a man cries or shows fear, it is instantly taken as weakness while being socially accepted by women.
If a woman shows anger or asserts dominance, it’s taken bad where as those emotions are socially accepted by men.
Also aging. Women aging=bad, washedup, need to settle down.
Men aging=good, wisdom, getting better with age, embrace the grey.
#33 Governments allowing themselves to do what they’ve banned others from doing.
#34 People seem to think nothing of a man choosing to not have kids, but women who don’t want them are judged to hell and back and even told “they’ll change their mind.”
Image source: ForsakenTakes