25 Times Women Felt Gaslit By Their Doctors While Trying To Describe Symptoms

Stories of medical misogyny keep surfacing because, even in this day and age, it remains a widespread problem. Many women attest that, based on their personal experiences, their health concerns are often dismissed or ignored by medical professionals.

#1

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When my mom was delivering me, she, obviously, was in a lot of pain and screaming. One of the nurses actually slapped her and said “calm down. All women have babies. You’re not special. Stop this.” And that was so insane to me because like everyone in the room was a woman and this nurse actually had the audacity to slap my mom?

My dad and grandpa sued the hospital after that btw. We won the case.

#2

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Went to the doctor for lower back pain, first appointment doctor asked if i was pregnant. took a year to find out i had 2 slipped discs.

#3

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Seeing my mom’s experience with Endometriosis really helped put into perspective how little the healthcare system cares about women. shes been in dehabilitating pain her whole life. shes been to doctors her whole life for this pain. about 5 years ago she learned about Endometriosis online and got the laparoscopy to diagnose. she had horrible endo all over most organs. she got it removed and wanted to get a hysterectomy. doctor said “what if you want kids in the future”. she is a 40+ year old woman with 6 kids. she doesnt want more kids, she cant even have more kids! and they said if she wanted a hysterectomy to be paid for by insurance she had to let the Endometriosis grow until its bad enough to remove 3 times. THEN she can get a hysterectomy. she ended up saving for it herself and felt instant relief. shes a much happier person now. i feel horrible she had to go through 20 years of gaslighting and belittling from uneducated doctors. just for her to have to pay for a hysterectomy herself? crazy.

#4

When my beautiful auntie was in consulting with her oncologist as she was going through crazy treatment for hormonal cancer that had stemmed from her ovaries , she asked to exercise the option of a hysterectomy as she had her 4 kids already but was still only 38. He shrugged his shoulders and said ‘ well I want a Lamborghini and you want a hysterectomy, guess we can’t always get what we want’. As a nurse myself who went along for support, I thoroughly ripped him a new one and still scowl whenever I think of that weasel.

Blessings to Bernie though, you were a queen x.

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#5

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I had a severe bacterial infection in my lungs that wold give me very aggressive cough (like the kind that doesn’t let you breathe).

The doctor refused to treat me because, according to him, the way I dressed was too revealing and exposing my chest to the cold weather was the reason why I got the cough. So I deserved it.

At the third appointment I took my grandma with me and she put the doctor back in his place so he eventually gave me some medication.

But the bacterial infection had gotten so bad that the cough became chronic and now I get it every year.

#6

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After finding out my sister has PCOS I looked it up, noticed I had many of the symptoms and talked to my PCP about it. I asked if we could look into it, she asked me if I was trying for children. I told her no but wanted to be on top of my health. She told me don’t worry about it until I wanted to get pregnant.

#7

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My mother needed a hysterectomy because she had a reproductive cancer. i’m not sure which one, but i think it was ovarian. doctors said no because she’s young and my father might want another child. i’m one of four and my father had already gotten a vasectomy, mind you. my father is a good man and he chewed them out then sued them on her behalf. they threw out the case. she fought for nearly six years to find a doctor who would operate on her, even with his consent. not as crazy as some of these others but it still disturbs me

#8

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Went to the ER and was told “you’re being dramatic, you’re probably just dehydrated”. i had a kidney infection.

#9

I’ve suffered from migraines since I was a preteen. They often cause me nausea. At one point the migraines were so bad/frequent that I was vomiting every day, couldn’t keep food down, etc.

I went to the doctor to ask for something to help with the nauseousness. What does the doctor tell me? “Well if you want to lose weight, we can put you on a diet plan… Blah blah.” Didn’t listen when I said I wasn’t trying to lose weight, I wasn’t forcing myself to throw up. I was ill.

I didn’t get any medicine from that visit. Didn’t get any help. I left the room in tears.

The worst part? The doctor was a woman. I was a healthy weight. But she saw a teenage girl throwing up and assumed eating disorder even despite being blatantly told otherwise. It took me seeing a male doctor for him to listen and easily give me medicine that helped.

It’s not always men that are misogynistic. Women hurt women too. Women disregard women. And I think that’s so sad.

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#10

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This brought back a memory. when i was just starting my junior year of high school, i went to the doctor because i had blood in my urine (not yet diagnosed kidney stone). the doctor insisted it was chlamydia. when i was confused because my literal only symptom was a urine with red in it, they doubled down and said they knew I was on birth control so it had to be because i, like supposedly all teenage girls to this doctor, were being dishonest about having unprotected intercourse. nothing i said mattered. it took another horrifyingly painful week to get the STD panel back completely negative, and by that time i had already had to go to the ER to pass it anyway.

#11

I remember during my diagnosis process the doctor straight up refused to do most tests because “it’s not possible to feel numbness from Lyme, it’s probably just your periods” (Lyme can cause numbness and I’d like to see how “my periods” could cause numbness and paralysis in my HAND) it took my dad to yell at them to “do all the tests” for them to do it .

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#12

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Was told my joint pain was psychosomatic. Never mind that I could move my joints in ways that were horrifyingly unnatural to a normal person.

#13

Ive been going deaf (it’s in my genes) and the ear doctor told me it was because I am a woman and we have too many thoughts to hear things….

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#14

Not my experience but that of my friend. She has some problems with her uterus that causes her pain and makes it way more likely that she’d have complications during childbirth, so she wants to get a hysterectomy to remove her uterus. It’s a completely voluntary procedure with little risk. Her doctor told her to “try to have some kids first” before he would agree to do the procedure. Until then, he flat out denied her request. This isn’t an uncommon experience either, with a lot of women saying that their doctors will either deny giving them the procedure until they have some children first, or saying that they need proof from the husband that he also doesn’t want children. It’s completely absurd and clearly sexist, but it continues to this day.

Meanwhile when I wanted a vasectomy, I got in with barely a question asked, and at a younger age than my friend did.

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#15

Yeah my orthodontist (male, 60s) used to rub my thigh when I had appointments for my braces. My mum just sat in the room and watched him do it. Not sure who I’m more disgusted by tbh.

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#16

A female EMT telling me, a female patient, at ~11yo when I passed out at a McDonald’s bc I was on my period, “if you want attention this is a bad way to get it”

I was in the ambulance alone.

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#17

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My sister has an unknown sleep disorder. After waiting like a year for an appointment in KY, the Dr. didn’t even look at her chart or her, only said ‘this is a psychological issue, it’s anxiety. Go to a psychiatrist.”

If he LOOKED AT HER CHART, he’d learn that she has a psychiatrist, therapist, and is on anxiety meds. I don’t think I’ll forget my sister crying on my dad’s shoulder after, saying that she just wants to sleep.

#18

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I went in for a MRI referral for my KNEE and got asked if I thought my birth control was causing my knee issues ( the knee had dislocated).

He drank 2 whole monsters in the 20 minute appointment, asked me multiple times if I was sure I needed a referral, then referred me for an Xray instead of an MRI without telling me.

#19

I went in with my mom and my doctor wouldn’t believe me when i told them my ankle was broken. it was purple. he told me to elevate it. a few days later, when it was already beginning to heal, i came in with my dad and suddenly it was a medical emergency.

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#20

It’s not that bad, but i remember my first gyno appointment. i was 12, having complaints about pain. the doctor (male) told me to “shave down there, its too hairy”.

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#21

Horrific periods from the age of 11, to the point I was vomiting and passing out because of the pain. They were lasting up to 3 weeks at a time & I was losing massive clots. I was told they’d sort themselves out after I’d had a baby. I WAS 11 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!!

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#22

My mom was born with an extra bone on her spinal column so when they tried to give her epidural when she was in labor with me, it didn’t work the first time because of the extra spinal bone and she tried to tell them and they refused to believe her. it apparently took a few hours of pain before they finally tried again.

my own experience is that i got diagnosed with autism ten years past the average age of diagnosis because my doctor and psychiatrist refused to believe that a girl could have both adhd and autism and i just wanted to get attention.

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#23

Two or three years ago I came in with my mom for severe rib pain, to the point I was sick and trying not to throw up while in class. I had the pain occasionally for about two months prior but throughout that week it became a constant. The doctor I went to said it was most likely SRS (slipping rib syndrome), but he also flat out said he didn’t want to actually diagnose me with it because I was a girl so because of that it’s just gas🧍
The next school year my mom called to try to get me a doctors note to get out of PE and swap to online so I wasn’t in so much pain from it, and the doctor goes “Nono I said I didn’t WANT to diagnose her with that so it should be gone now”, thank you American healthcare.

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#24

Having to explain to my boyfriend that we can’t go to the E.R/urgent care/whatever even though I’m puking from severe menstrual cramps.

“babe, they’ll give you something stronger than pamprin for this”
cue me, hormonally enraged, explaining to him that the most I’ll get is a Tylenol.

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#25

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My Dad was doing the crossword as my Mom was in labor. The nurse asked her to be quieter so he could focus. Lmao.

#26

When I was a baby, I had some serious gastrointestinal issues (screaming for hours after eating, refusing to eat, etc) and my mom was desperate to get help. First two doctors brushed her off as a mom who couldn’t handle a crying baby. Third doctor told her if she couldn’t deal with a crying baby, he would “gladly take the baby off her hands,” because his wife had always wanted a girl.

Fourth doctor: turns out I had an enlarged bowel that left me seriously constipated after meals, which would require daily medicine to combat, AND I had bad acid reflux. Things got a lot better after that. The story still pisses off my mom to this day.

Took four pediatricians to figure that out because obviously, an incessantly crying baby is the fault of the mother, and not a sign of any underlying issues. This was 2003.

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#27

Well I mean the sole fact that the “father of gynecology” literally experimented on black women without their consent nor anesthesia is crazy to me.

One though that stands out is there was a peer reviewed study done in like 2013 I believe on endometriosis (yknow…something that is already severely under researched). They were given money to research the disease, and you know what they did? They measured the attractiveness level of the womens bodies with endo. They came to the conclusion that women with endometriosis had “better looking bodies”

Btw here’s the link to and about the study. Someone asked but it won’t let me reply to them. It was finally redacted in 2020.

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#28

I was told I’d be in “absolutely excruciating pain” if bile was leaking into my abdomen after my gallbladder had been accidentally removed.
Turns out that roughly 1.5L of bile per day was leaking into my abdomen and I *was* in excruciating pain. They just didn’t believe me. 🙄

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#29

My mom had me at 17. She was a child. She told me it was hard. It was also hard meeting people years later including her doctors looking at me when I was 17 and saying “glad to see you didn’t end up like your mom”

It hurts. It’s gross. My mom is mentally ill but she is an amazing mother who did the best with the life she was dealt.

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#30

It didn’t matter what I was going to the dr for, everything was because I was fat.

Doesn’t matter that when I got down to 150lbs (I’m 5’10 and was working in a warehouse at the time so I was very muscled) my problems were the worst they ever had been, it was still because I was fat.

When I got not one, but two heart tests that lasted 24hr and then 48hr, I went back to the dr to return the monitor and they just told me, and I quote, “We saw something but we don’t know what it is. But you’re 23, you’re probably fine!!!” Like thank you for making me pay several hundred dollars for you just shrug and say “meh idk”.

I now know it was likely POTS symptoms. No way of knowing for sure since they didn’t do anything else for me, even blood work, but yeah.

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#31

Came in for an ultrasound scan in awful pains & 40 degree fever, suspected appendicitis. Was asked if there was a chance I was pregnant. I was 13. When they got told there was absolutely zero chance of that, the doctor asked if it could be psychological. I HAD 40 DEGREE FEVER, THAT DEFINITELY WASNT PSYCHOLOGICAL!

When I was 12 or 11, I started getting my period and it was immediately extremely painful. Like, passing out, throwing up, no pills working and not being able to move properly extreme painful. I had to go to three obgyns just so someone would look into it, because apparently I looked fine (the first two didn’t do any tests), and I was “probably just overreacting” as I wasn’t used to it.

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#32

When my wife was in delivering our first born, after 1 hour of been at the hospital she told the nurse she was in a lot of pain and was ready to push. The nurse huffed and walked out and we heard her say to one of the other nurses. “We have a patient in here, it’s her first time and she’s not dealing with it very well” Within 5 minutes we were being rushed to the labour ward. (She was Unable to walk). As soon as we got in the room my wife stripped off, got on the bed and pushed. 20 minutes later my daughter was born.

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#33

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I’m not sure if this was misogyny or not (my mother is also black, and some doctors are just terrible), but when my mother was giving birth to me, she tore. when they were stitching her up, the pain relief (not sure what it’s called) wore off. she told the doctors, but they didn’t believe her until after they were done.

#34

When I was 14, I missed 2 periods. As a trans guy? Euphoric. But as a 14, still a virgin, and having cramps with nothing still perceived as a girl? Wasn’t good. The doctor did not belive me for one second. He called me a liar while my mum was out the room going to get my little sister. I never told her but it still scares me. Still pre-T, still missing periods and throwing up every other day due to the other symptoms that have developed, (and still a virigin) terrified of gynecologists. I hate going, even if it’s just to talk.

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#35

Male midwife told me my frequent UTIs were because I wasn’t cleaning myself properly in the shower (I actually had a growth in my bladder).

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