Women Share 20 Red Flags To Look Out For In A Guy’s Apartment
When you first meet someone and are invited to their home it can be an exciting occasion. A person’s home can say a lot about them as an individual. There are so many little telling signs regarding personal hygiene, to possibly sadistic preferences that you can pick up on if your aware enough.
A recent thread garnered a lot of attention when it appealed to women to reveal the particular things that rang alarm bells in their heads when they visited a guy’s apartment for the first time and the ladies did not disappoint. Browse some of the responses received below on what red flags us women need to watch out for in a similar situation.
More info: Reddit
Roommates who don’t ask your name or really even say hi. This usually means he has girls in and out of the apartment and they don’t feel like putting the effort in any longer.
I once dated a guy who had a six-inch marijuana plant growing from his damply disgusting bathroom carpet. It wasn’t so much the weed that put me off, it was that he had shag carpeting *in the bathroom.*
I’ve gone on two separate first dates where I’ve gone back to his place, only to find an array of BDSM equipment laid out neatly on his bed in anticipation — once to be used on him, once to be used on me. (It wasn’t used on either of us, either time.) These were *first dates.*
I’m down, but there has to be a conversation first, you know? You can’t just spring that on someone.
If there’s plastic over the furniture, that can only mean one of three things:
1. He has extreme OCD
2. He’s repainting
3. You’re about to have your organs harvested
Image source: TheF0CTOR
Once went on a date with a guy. Went back to his studio apartment and there was a “security” camera on the wall that had the bed and whole living area in view. Didn’t know him very well, didn’t fully trust the camera was off. Red flag
Too many mirrors.
A half completed suit made of human skin on a tailors dummy.
He has much more stuff than he can realistically afford to own. And I don’t just mean unmanageable debt. Let’s say he has no debts but he’s consistently vague or dodgy about what he does for a living. “I’m into imports”. FLEE.
Lots of pictures of his ex.
Having worked with social services, if the bathroom lock looks like it’s been replaced several times, leave and don’t go back.
I went to a guys (late 20’s) apartment and he had spongebob squarepants sheets and the entire collection of ICarly on dvd. He did not have kids.
Edit: I realize that these things alone could be harmless. These were just the initial red flags though. I stopped talking to him after he showed me a picture of his 13 year old sister that he carried around with him and talked about how “sexy” she was and how he didn’t understand why his mom wouldn’t allow him to come visit her.
The Confederate flag
I like to follow the advice of one of my favourite quotes:
“We need to make books cool again. If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t f**k them.”
Holes in walls. F**k no.
EDIT: I was talking about holes he punched in anger (or for fun, which is crazy behaviour)
EDIT 2: I’m SO SORRY to all the guys and girls out there with anger management issues that they are working on. I didn’t mean to belittle your situation. I was thinking of the type of person who smashes walls, furniture, windows and people without giving a damn what happens next. I was thinking of legitimate A******S. Anger issues does NOT make you an a*****e by default (I struggle with this sometimes too, though not to the extent that others have mentioned, so I get how it messes up your self-esteem and ideas about what kind of person you are). For all of those people who are struggling with this type of issue and are trying to fix it, you deserve utmost respect. That s**t is HARD. Sorry for the blow to the self-esteem, that’s not fun when you’re already struggling. ):
No cleaning supplies. No toilet cleaner, dish soap, dish rack, mop, broom, vacuum, dirty dishes in the sink (like a pile that hasn’t been done in a while), no trash bag in the trash can. lots more but can’t think of all of them right now
Cat s**t smeared around the litter box and ground into the floor. Anything having to do with s**t, p**s, and mold not being cleaned up/taken care of.
It just baffles me, like if this is what you’re willing to show me the first time I ever visit your apartment I can’t imagine what horrors await me when we really get to know each other.
Edit: in addition to this, your cat having constant diarrhea in addition to everything above is a huge red flag that you not only can’t take care of yourself, but you also can’t take care of the one other life that you are in charge of
Image source: mossattacks
Pee in water bottles.
Walked in. Took a look and walked right the f**k back out.
Image source: anon
Plates and/or silverware crusted with old food.
Bonus points if they’re plastic.
Extra bonus points if they’re in the bedroom.
Extra extra bonus points if they’re in the sink with the dishwasher empty.
A closet full of empty alcohol bottles presented as an achievement
Image source: hapile
Sheets that smell and look dirty.
No soap at the bathroom sink.
Clear evidence that he eats straight out of the pot or pan. Edit- eating out of the pot, ok, efficient. My true objection was that there were always multiple pots with food left lying around his place. Accidentally stepping into a pan of cold pasta is never an experience I want to repeat.
Sink full of dishes growing their own life forms.
Huge gaming computer with trash all around it, literally thrown on the ground and never dealt with.
Soap scum in the shower so thick you can run a nail through it to the tiling.
This is all one guy. I should have noped out faster, but was ignorant of men being decent creatures. Tbf- I was 19.
Edit- spelling. And clarification regarding pots.
A bathroom sink and floor so covered in hair you’re not sure what color the sink is/was.
A bedroom filled with so much s**t it looks like a hoarder house.
No couches. No sitting area. Just a tv and a lawn chair for gaming.
I walked out within 10 minutes and regretted A LOT.
Edit: spelling because typing is hard.