Women Share 20 Red Flags To Look Out For In A Guy’s Apartment

Published 1 year ago

When you first meet someone and are invited to their home it can be an exciting occasion. A person’s home can say a lot about them as an individual. There are so many little telling signs regarding personal hygiene, to possibly sadistic preferences that you can pick up on if your aware enough.

A recent thread garnered a lot of attention when it appealed to women to reveal the particular things that rang alarm bells in their heads when they visited a guy’s apartment for the first time and the ladies did not disappoint. Browse some of the responses received below on what red flags us women need to watch out for in a similar situation.

More info: Reddit

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Image source: ToxicLuv, Sigmund

Roommates who don’t ask your name or really even say hi. This usually means he has girls in and out of the apartment and they don’t feel like putting the effort in any longer.


Image source: SuzQP, Majestik-Eagle

I once dated a guy who had a six-inch marijuana plant growing from his damply disgusting bathroom carpet. It wasn’t so much the weed that put me off, it was that he had shag carpeting *in the bathroom.*


Image source: Portarossa, Harry Page

I’ve gone on two separate first dates where I’ve gone back to his place, only to find an array of BDSM equipment laid out neatly on his bed in anticipation — once to be used on him, once to be used on me. (It wasn’t used on either of us, either time.) These were *first dates.*

I’m down, but there has to be a conversation first, you know? You can’t just spring that on someone.


If there’s plastic over the furniture, that can only mean one of three things:

1. He has extreme OCD

2. He’s repainting

3. You’re about to have your organs harvested

Image source: TheF0CTOR


Image source: Mooneater13, Mary Oakey

Once went on a date with a guy. Went back to his studio apartment and there was a “security” camera on the wall that had the bed and whole living area in view. Didn’t know him very well, didn’t fully trust the camera was off. Red flag


Image source: hobbes_shot_first, Ellen Tanner

Too many mirrors.

Erotic art.

A half completed suit made of human skin on a tailors dummy.


Image source: Patches67, Hunters Race

He has much more stuff than he can realistically afford to own. And I don’t just mean unmanageable debt. Let’s say he has no debts but he’s consistently vague or dodgy about what he does for a living. “I’m into imports”. FLEE.


Image source: Toodlepie, cottonbro studio

Lots of pictures of his ex.


Image source: EmpireofAzad, Amanda Vick

Having worked with social services, if the bathroom lock looks like it’s been replaced several times, leave and don’t go back.


Image source: Jessibeeb, Cbfalbo

I went to a guys (late 20’s) apartment and he had spongebob squarepants sheets and the entire collection of ICarly on dvd. He did not have kids.

Edit: I realize that these things alone could be harmless. These were just the initial red flags though. I stopped talking to him after he showed me a picture of his 13 year old sister that he carried around with him and talked about how “sexy” she was and how he didn’t understand why his mom wouldn’t allow him to come visit her.


Image source: anon, Steve Baker

The Confederate flag


Image source: nymph_suicide, Florencia Viadana

I like to follow the advice of one of my favourite quotes:

“We need to make books cool again. If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t f**k them.”

-John Waters


Image source: anon, shaireproductions.com

Holes in walls. F**k no.

EDIT: I was talking about holes he punched in anger (or for fun, which is crazy behaviour)

EDIT 2: I’m SO SORRY to all the guys and girls out there with anger management issues that they are working on. I didn’t mean to belittle your situation. I was thinking of the type of person who smashes walls, furniture, windows and people without giving a damn what happens next. I was thinking of legitimate A******S. Anger issues does NOT make you an a*****e by default (I struggle with this sometimes too, though not to the extent that others have mentioned, so I get how it messes up your self-esteem and ideas about what kind of person you are). For all of those people who are struggling with this type of issue and are trying to fix it, you deserve utmost respect. That s**t is HARD. Sorry for the blow to the self-esteem, that’s not fun when you’re already struggling. ):


Image source: poorcupid, Ellie Burgin

No cleaning supplies. No toilet cleaner, dish soap, dish rack, mop, broom, vacuum, dirty dishes in the sink (like a pile that hasn’t been done in a while), no trash bag in the trash can. lots more but can’t think of all of them right now


Cat s**t smeared around the litter box and ground into the floor. Anything having to do with s**t, p**s, and mold not being cleaned up/taken care of.

It just baffles me, like if this is what you’re willing to show me the first time I ever visit your apartment I can’t imagine what horrors await me when we really get to know each other.

Edit: in addition to this, your cat having constant diarrhea in addition to everything above is a huge red flag that you not only can’t take care of yourself, but you also can’t take care of the one other life that you are in charge of

Image source: mossattacks


Pee in water bottles.
Walked in. Took a look and walked right the f**k back out.

Image source: anon


Image source: meakcpark, Portuguese Gravity

Plates and/or silverware crusted with old food.

Bonus points if they’re plastic.

Extra bonus points if they’re in the bedroom.

Extra extra bonus points if they’re in the sink with the dishwasher empty.


A closet full of empty alcohol bottles presented as an achievement

Image source: hapile


Image source: daisy-chain-of-doom, Becca Schultz

Sheets that smell and look dirty.

No soap at the bathroom sink.

Skid marks

Clear evidence that he eats straight out of the pot or pan. Edit- eating out of the pot, ok, efficient. My true objection was that there were always multiple pots with food left lying around his place. Accidentally stepping into a pan of cold pasta is never an experience I want to repeat.

Sink full of dishes growing their own life forms.

Huge gaming computer with trash all around it, literally thrown on the ground and never dealt with.

Soap scum in the shower so thick you can run a nail through it to the tiling.

This is all one guy. I should have noped out faster, but was ignorant of men being decent creatures. Tbf- I was 19.

Edit- spelling. And clarification regarding pots.


Image source: katsu_later, Erik Mclean

A bathroom sink and floor so covered in hair you’re not sure what color the sink is/was.

A bedroom filled with so much s**t it looks like a hoarder house.

No couches. No sitting area. Just a tv and a lawn chair for gaming.

I walked out within 10 minutes and regretted A LOT.

Edit: spelling because typing is hard.

Shanilou Perera

Shanilou has always loved reading and learning about the world we live in. While she enjoys fictional books and stories just as much, since childhood she was especially fascinated by encyclopaedias and strangely enough, self-help books. As a kid, she spent most of her time consuming as much knowledge as she could get her hands on and could always be found at the library. Now, she still enjoys finding out about all the amazing things that surround us in our day-to-day lives and is blessed to be able to write about them to share with the whole world as a profession.

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Dating, dating safety, first date, guy's apartment, men red flags, mens apartment, red flags
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