25 Ways In Which How One Misstep Changed Everything For These People

Published 2 months ago

In the realm of human interaction, first impressions wield significant power. It’s often said that it takes months, even years, to build a good reputation, yet it can be demolished in an instant. Nowhere is this truer than in the anecdotes shared by individuals on platforms like Reddit, where users have been divulging the quickest ways someone has turned them off – and how, surprisingly, such moments can catalyze personal growth.

In these candid discussions, Reddit users have recounted tales of encounters where a single action or statement shattered their perception of someone. From insensitive remarks to questionable behaviour, these instances showcase the fragility of our impressions of others and the importance of mindfulness in our interactions.

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#1 Was at a ballgame for a birthday with some work friends I’d known for years, the kind of guys that a certain amount of my future job success depended upon (one manager, one assoc director). I’d been at this company five years, and by this point it was listed by Forbes as one of the top ten mid-sized companies to work for in the entire US

Image source: BonfireMaestro, ELEVATE

One of them sat down and started talking about how he’d felt the a*s of the woman sitting in front of us a few minutes before. She hadn’t responded well, so then he went on to describe how it wasn’t that good anyway.

I had this moment where everything in my head went quiet. Like an almost out of body experience. I could see my credibility with these guys, built up over years, hang in the balance against my self-respect and character. I took a really hard swallow, then proceeded to berate this guy VERY loudly and tell him he should apologize. Everyone went dead quiet, then pretended like nothing had happened. The rest of the day went on like normal.

Never got invited out again. Two of them went on to direct sun-divisions of their departments as a part of an old-boy’s in-crowd. I left the company a year later.

I regret nothing.

#2 A girl I was seeing casually called my former roommate a racial slur while I was driving the two of us to dinner. I pulled over, dropped her off on a street corner, then went and got dinner on my own.

Image source: Chavestvaldt, RDNE Stock project

#3 Her: “Once I was fighting with my boyfriend and I punched him multiple times in the arm.”
Me: “What? That’s not nice.”
Her: “No, no, it was fine, I felt better afterwards!”

Image source: Haebak, Keira Burton

I had no words. It soured my view of her in an instant.

#4 I was hanging out with friends once and got introduced to a friend of a friend and within minutes this dude was talking about how nice it is to get a break from his annoying wife lmao like brother I have barely known you for five mins and you’re telling me what a b***h your wife is? Off the get go I knew this guy was an a*****e.

Image source: realfakejames, RDNE Stock project

#5 This happened to a friend. In 1973, my friend, who was a teenager and a huge Knicks fan, actually went to the airport to meet the Knicks’ plane and try to get some autographs.

Image source: Bx1965, RDNE Stock project

My friend is an Orthodox Jew and was wearing his kippah. The plane came in and my friend was jumping up, calling out the players’ and waving his autograph book. One player actually came over and was going to take my friend’s pen to sign when he spotted the kippah. He dropped the pen and said “I don’t do s**t for Jews.”.

#6 Matched with a lady on tinder. I always go to the let’s get coffee as soon as possible to filter out the women who just like to chat endlessly.

Image source: UtahCyan, Andrea Piacquadio

To my surprise, she says yes. Could of days later we meet to outside of the coffee shop, we walk in, and she says, ” Ew, I don’t want coffee from this place, I don’t care for the people serving the coffee.”

I ask, “oh, you know them?” She responds, “no, but I know their type.” “What do you mean, their type?” , thinking maybe she didn’t like hipsters.

“Well black people are always gross and dirty, and I don’t want to have them serving me.”  I look at her, and she’s really hot, and kind of dressed sl**ty. So most of the time a guy will allow a certain amount of WTF in a girl like that.

But no, I just say I don’t think this will work, and then block her as I’m walking away.  I think our total in person interaction was like less than 5 minutes, maybe less than 2. I don’t date racists. I didn’t tolerate racists. No amount of hot on the outside will overcome that ugly on the inside.

Thanks for reminding me of that girl. I had forgotten about that experience. .

#7 Being a complete b***h to servers at a restaurant. I don’t care how hot you are. Treating service workers poorly and with entitlement is such a turn off.

Image source: Yak-Fucker-5000, Ketut Subiyanto

#8 I got a friend hired at the restaurant I work at. Anyone in that industry knows that “Christmas bonuses” aren’t really a thing but I’m lucky enough to work for a small business that gives one out every year. She got hers after only working there for a couple months, opens the envelope and says “that’s it??” I just found it so distasteful that she scoffed at free money she didn’t even have to work for and wasn’t entitled to. How ungrateful can you be.

Image source: Redtember, Karolina Grabowska

#9 Was having dinner out with some friends and one girl who I was on the fence about. At the end of the meal, one of them began cleaning the trash out of her purse and piling it on our dirty dishes. I asked why she was doing that, and she said “It’s the waitstaff’s job to clean up after me.” Technically it is, but it’s NOT their job to clean up your personal trash.  My opinion of her became decidedly negative after that!

Image source: Lilmissthrowaway108, Liliana Drew

#10 Wife and I were house-shopping. Or realtor had done a great job finding houses in our price range and negotiating a fair price. Then at closing she confirmed the final price and said “I tried to Jew the owner down a little more, but he wouldn’t move.”

Image source: onemanbucket_, Gustavo Fring

“Uh … you did what?” we asked.

“Yeah, I tried to Jew him down a little more, but he wouldn’t budge,” she said.

Us: “You know that’s antisemitic, right?”

Her: “No it isn’t. I’ve used it for years.”

If we could have backed out of closing, we would have. We didn’t use her again when it was time to sell that house, though. And for whatever it’s worth we did return the gift basket she sent us.

#11 Abusing their pets. Neglecting their kids.

Image source: Echo831, cottonbro studio

#12 A girl I was dating screamed at her mom.

Image source: ayoungtommyleejones, Alex Green

We were about to get down to business (sex), when her mother called. I could hear both sides of the convo. Her mom wanted to know if my girlfriend had accidentally taken her mother’s house keys the last time she was staying over at their place. Girlfriend says no, annoyed, without hesitation. Mom asks if she could just check her purse when she had a moment because she couldn’t find them anywhere. Girlfriend erupts out of nowhere screaming at her mom, accusing her mom of accusing her, which wasn’t what was happening. She hangs up on her mom, who I hear audibly sobbing. Girlfriend then checks her purse and finds the lost keys. Instead of calling her mom, she calls her dad, tells him to come get them on the condition that he doesn’t say where he found them. I could barely stand to be in the same room as her after that.

#13 Had a really good friend from early adulthood. We met when we were 19. We went on a vacation together when we were 30. While there, we met a French woman who was there for a destination wedding.

Image source: A0ma, cottonbro studio

We chatted for a bit in French before I retired to our AirBnB. I’m married so I wasn’t looking for hookups or anything. I wake up in the night to go to the bathroom and walk in on them half-undressed on the couch. I say, “Pardonnez-moi” and start walking to the bathroom. She, very drunkenly says, “Wait, your friend speaks French?” I stopped, turned to my friend, and said, “Dude, if she’s too drunk to remember talking to me in French an hour ago she’s too drunk to consent.” I helped her get her things and we walked her drunk a*s home. Definitely changed my opinion of him, and we split up for the rest of the trip.

#14 Been unkind to animals.

Image source: anon

#15 Oh I posted a good story about this on a different subreddit yesterday. My dad’s a member of a men’s club at a golf course and has a few friends he golfs with a lot.

Image source: FlatulentDwarf, Mick Haupt

I’m not a member but he brings me along as a +1 so I know some of his better golf friends. There’s a guy we’ll call Jim that he golfs with a lot, they’ve probably been golf friends for a decade. Recently I was in a 4-some with my dad, Jim and a random. We’re making small talk waiting for the green to clear on one of the par 3’s when the random makes a complaint about an Asian moving in next door and how it bothered him. Jim responds “Oh, I don’t mind having Asians living nearby. It’s the Mexicans that bother me. Especially if they have kids. You just know they’re going to end up gang bangers and d**g dealers and bring all kinds of s**t to the neighborhood.”

So I’m going to say that. That comment moved Jim from one of my dad’s cooler golf friends to someone I never want to golf with again. Over the rest of the round Jim and the random made a lot of comments just casually spewing racism, sexism and anti-LGBT sentiment. My dad was as baffled as I was. When we got back to the car my dad said he wasn’t going to be trying to share a 4-some with Jim or hang with him at the range anymore.

#16 Dated a woman a while back, we were talking on the phone as she was driving home. She pulled into a fast food place to get something, and I got an earful of her treating the employees there like s**t. How you treat people you don’t necessarily have to be nice to says a lot about you. I hung up on her and never spoke to her again.

Image source: Bionic_Ninjas, Erik Mclean

#17 I met some (now former) coworkers out for dinner one night, and after the first round of drinks, one of them’s husband showed up to join us. I had met him a few times before and had always thought he was a nice enough dude. Laid back, good conversation, chill.

Image source: jeanneeebeanneee, cottonbro studio

He ordered lemon pepper wings, and the server brought out ones that had dark red sauce on them, so clearly not the correct flavor. No big deal, right? Well this guy acted like the server had spit in his face or something. He made a huge stink, demanded the manager, and was being so loud that half the restaurant was looking at our table. It was incredibly embarrassing.

His wife, my coworker, just sat there rubbing his back and saying “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry” to him while he had his tantrum, like he had just watched his dog die or something. It totally put me off both of them. She was not invited to any subsequent dinner meetups. No one wanted to risk that happening again.

#18 I met a girl in college and we became friends. I felt sorry for her that she didn’t have any friends and was kind of awkward, because I’d been in those shoes too, so I introduced her to my friend circle and things were cool.

Image source: starlet25, Budgeron Bach

Then, she calmly informed me that all of them were creeps and p*dos. I asked her what the f**k she meant by that, and she told me that they must be, because they were adults (keep in mind, we were all sophomores in college) who liked comics and cosplay, so they *had* to be creeps. I turned the car around and brought her right back to her dorm, and immediately told my friends. The irony of it was, *she* was, and still is, a decade later, *obsessed* with a certain YA series.

#19 “Just cuz there’s a goalie doesn’t mean you can’t score” aaaand you’re gross. Cheating is pathetic. You were cute but nvm thanks.

Image source: awakami, SHVETS production

#20 My old supervisor was one of the smartest guys I’ve ever met he taught me loads, I had massive respect for him and we worked as a team, he was pretty old so I did all his heavy lifting for him (we were welder fabricators). One day in conversation he told me he doesn’t believe in evolution and dinosaurs were a hoax ? didn’t really ruin my opinion but how can someone I saw as so clever be so stupid lol.

Image source: bedlam90, Hurrah suhail

#21 Picked me up for a date, got on the highway, and revved it up to drive over 100 mph, weaving in between cars. I was terrified, tears in my eyes, asking him to slow down and he laughed. It was so f*****g scary, I can’t even explain it. Literally thought I was going to die, he was going *so fast*, well over 100 mph, and just weaving between cars. Just terrifying. I took a taxi home and never saw him again. I’d had a crush on him for like 2 years at that point. I never wanted to see him again.

Image source: Global_Telephone_751, cottonbro studio

#22 I was pretty good pals with this one dude at work. Good banter, chill as can be and all that. But then I heard him talk about his girlfriend for the first time and how she does nothing around the house and how she’s typical for a modern woman because she doesn’t do chores. I instantly understood why all the women at work hated his guts, and from that point on I did, too.

Image source: WilhelmIGV, cottonbro studio

And to add on to this, he also said therapy is for weak-minded people. I went to therapy for five years and it helped me deal with so many things that felt overwhelming before. Thankfully he no longer works there and our workplace is better for it.

#23 I’m often welcoming to new employees at the company I work for on trips, just to be hospitable. I had a coworker who was the new guy at the time suggest we go get some hookers while on a work trip. He had already creeped out several female coworkers with staring and inappropriate comments and then he dropped that on me.

Image source: mattbnet, Laura Tancredi

I could never look at him the same way and he ended up not lasting long at the company, thankfully. It was weird and I’d never experienced anything like that before or since.

#24 Well for me. I was starting to make friends with this girl from my job. It was great at first because we had a lot of things common, and I was thrilled to have a new friend. So, I planned a hangout with her off work.

Image source: Ghastly_Golden, Adnan Pervaiz

She told me that she had her brother at home and didn’t want to leave him by himself. I didn’t find anything wrong with that. I told her that she can bring him along then. It was the worst decision because if I knew. I wouldn’t have asked her to. Through out the whole hangout, she kept trying to set me up with her brother. I just felt uncomfortable because she would high light my ethnicity and constantly say that her brother always wanted a spanish girlfriend. She would also encourage us to talk alone, and that we had so much in common. I kept telling her I wasn’t interested but she didn’t listen. The night got progressly more worse, when we stopped to eat at a restaurant after hiking. Her and her brother ordered a lot of things. I didn’t order as much, only one thing from the menu. When it was time to pay, they forfeit the bill. Pure silence. Her intention was obvious. She wanted me to pay for it all. I asked to split the bill and she started to complain how expensive it was. Never again. I decided it was best to remain as coworkers instead of friends.

#25 Had a coworker who admitted they didn’t pick up their dog’s poop when walking. A couple years later I found out they were an anti-vaxxer.

Image source: llamainleggings, Samson Katt

Shanilou Perera

Shanilou has always loved reading and learning about the world we live in. While she enjoys fictional books and stories just as much, since childhood she was especially fascinated by encyclopaedias and strangely enough, self-help books. As a kid, she spent most of her time consuming as much knowledge as she could get her hands on and could always be found at the library. Now, she still enjoys finding out about all the amazing things that surround us in our day-to-day lives and is blessed to be able to write about them to share with the whole world as a profession.

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bad decisions, image, impressions, people, reputation, ruined reputation, social issues
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