30 Disturbing Secrets People Were Holding On For So Long

In the vast expanse of the internet, amidst the anonymity of usernames and avatars, individuals often find solace in sharing their deepest secrets and vulnerabilities. Recently, a seemingly innocuous question sparked a profound and revealing conversation on the social media platform Reddit: “What is your most disturbing secret?” What followed was a cascade of confessions, each unveiling a glimpse into the complexities of the human psyche.

#1

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I’m terrified of going into work….not work itself, I’m a hard worker, but I despise sitting in an office full of people I barely know, constantly being ‘on’, being evaluated in person, and pretending I enjoy not being warm and safe in my cozy home.

For some of us the pandemic was a blessing.

#2

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My ex-husband told me one time that he didn’t think it was wrong for a father to be sexually intimate with his daughter, as long as she was “old enough.” No one will ever know why we truly divorced, because I don’t think anyone would believe me. He started talking about children. I’d never let my daughter be his.

#3

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My husband passed away a few years ago. I tell everyone how much I loved him and only talk about the good times we had and how great he was. In honesty I hated him for every bit of the 33 years we were together. He was so mean to me, both physicaly and mentally-every single day. He hid it well and in front of anyone he was okay to me but when we were alone he was terrible. I hated him so much I live alone now and am just finding myself. I moved to a different state and have made new friends and everyone seems to really like me and I even like myself now too. It’s been really hard to tell myself that I am okay. I have never said any of this out loud. I feel bad that I am happy he is gone.

#4

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A few years ago one of our cats died after we had her for 14 years. We were all heartbroken and devastated by her loss. We noticed something was wrong on Thursday, took her to the vet on Friday, and she died late Sunday night.

The night she died, I sent everyone to bed and I stayed up with her. She kept getting into the bathtub and lying down as opposed to a bed we had set up for her.

Just before she died, she let out a horrible scream and went into convulsions. Then she just stopped breathing.

I never told my spouse or kids about that last few moments. I just told them she just slipped away. I still want to cry every time I think about it. I will never tell them about that.

#5

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I can login to the jukebox at my local bar from my apartment. I often login from home and require it to play “what does the fox say” on repeat.

#6

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A few years ago I used to work at Home Depot at the returns desk. It was mostly very elderly people who worked alongside me in our store. I was the youngest in the team.

We had a lady, Margaret, who had issues with bowel control due to her medications. She used to fart without even realizing she’s farting. Usually loud but harmless ones even when she was having a normal conversation. So we got so used to her doing that, even though it was awkward in the beginning.

One day we were having a team huddle and it started to smell like fresh manure..such a strong stench..and then one more with different flavor this time. The manager dismissed the team huddle…and one of the team members murmured “My God, Margaret, what was that!!”

It was me. I did that Margaret, I’m sorry.

#7

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All day, every day, relapsing is all I can think about. I’ve been clean for 3 1/2 months but oh boy is it difficult. I crave the relapse. The ONLY reason I haven’t is because it would hurt my boyfriend to see me relapse.

#8

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I walk around the house and monologue. Like, a lot.

#9

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I hid the remote control to the living room TV for absolutely no reason at all, and kept it hidden for probably a week. My dad began to have a meltdown by the 6th-7th day, so I just put it under a random blanket on the couch where I knew he would find it. What a weird kid I was.

#10

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My friend’s younger brother took a dump in the litter box as a teen “to see what it was like”. Their mom, an RN, saw it and declared “there is a human SH*T in the litter box!” Whenever anyone brings up anything litter box-related, I think of this.

#11

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I once felt overwhelmed with the compulsion to run through a farmer’s wheatfield, I felt very naughty.

#12

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My husband and I look so happy on social media but in reality we argue every day and our marriage is falling apart.

#13

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Sometimes I make loud farting noises late at night to see if I can wake up the whole house. I consider it a victory when I’m asked if I’m feeling ok the next morning. .

#14

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One time I had to go number 2 so bad but our bathroom was occupied. So I went outside and the dog immediately gobbled it up.

#15

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I brushed my sister‘s toothbrush over a soap bar when we were little because I thought that’s what she did too. sometimes my toothbrush tasted a little soapy. Never talked about it with anyone. First time writing it down.

#16

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I tell people I can get them exotic meats…hippo steaks, giraffe burgers.

It’s all goat.

#17

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Not a single person I’ve met in the last 10 years knows anything true about me. Not my name, not my profession, not my family life, not where I’m from etc. I’ve created an entirely fake person, and that’s who I am to everyone that I meet now. Even my girlfriend.

#18

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I have a good friend who is a very shy pooper. Like, we’ve been on trips together and he won’t s**t for days, he says he just can’t relax and go because he’s in public. But one time in college, about six years ago, he was super drunk and fell asleep s******g on my toilet. And the s**t got all over my toilet, not sure how but most of it did not go in the bowl. I got him up, cleaned him and the toilet up, and put him to bed. He was blackout drunk and doesn’t remember it at all. I don’t have the heart to tell him. He’d be mortified. It wouldn’t do anyone any good. But when he’s shy about pooping around me, I can’t help but chuckle at the irony.

#19

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People in my personal life who find out I’m a professional domme, instantly feel free about telling me their darkest secrets.

I know who’s secretly gay, I know who’s on steroids, I know who’s kinky, I know who has erectile dysfunction, I know both men & women who were brutally sa’d as children, I even know someone who’s k****d a guy (he wasn’t boasting or bragging, he seemed really shook up about it. I might be the only one he’s told)

So, my most disturbing secret is that I’m a trauma-sponge for absorbing everyone else’s disturbing secrets.

#20

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I’m an alcoholic. no one is aware of how bad it’s gotten but i’m drinking to almost blackout daily and going to work ill every single day. i still do my job fine but the second i’m off it’s all i want to do and i can’t stop myself anymore. it’s been like this for almost 2 years now

what i’m doing to myself while acting completely fine to everyone disturbs me but i’m really struggling to get myself help :/.

#21

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I accidentally stepped barefoot into a boiling, maggot-infested raccoon corpse. It got stuck on my foot like a slipper and I tried to shake it off, something popped and got a spray of blood and s**t all over me. Then I puked on myself and stumbled home.

#22

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During my worst periods of dealing with bulimia, if I had no food on hand to binge and purge, I would steal lunches from people at work or pick things out of the trash. I was never caught.
The shame, guilt, and disgust with myself was always there, but it took intensive counseling, medication, and working with a specialist on other issues to help me to stop.

#23

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My family think I finished the computer science degree, but I dropped out. However I’ve been working in the sector for about 25 years in a row without any trouble and people (employers and colleagues) seem to think that I’m quite competent. It’s not disturbing per se but for my parents it was a big deal that I finished my studies. My dad passed away three years ago without knowing. My mom is 83 and she is still proud of me and I hope things stay the same till she dies.

#24

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I never had a gf but told everyone I did have one and that she broke up with me. I was so good at lying about it that I myself believed my lie and somehow I felt really sad and depressed. Than I even remembered memories I never had and afterwards I was like wtf am I doing.

#25

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When we first met he made me promise “if I ever gain too much weight you have to tell me to hit the gym.” We laughed about it but that was almost 5 years ago, and now he has gotten pretty overweight and I don’t know if I’m supposed to keep my promise or just let him choose his own path with his weight. I’m still attracted to him and love him more than ever, but I want him to be healthy…

#26

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As a teen, I caught my parents’ house on fire playing with pyrotechnics in the garage and then staged it to look like an electrical fire so i wouldn’t get in trouble.

I was regarded as the hero who put the fire out before it consumed the house (I was home alone at the time), but really, I was the cause.

They had all of the electrical redone in the house as a precaution against another fire… I never came clean.

#27

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I have a serious skin picking problem. I can just sit for hours straight in front of a mirror and inspect every pore on my face/chest/hands. It’s gotten so bad that i have little scars all over my face. But i literally cant stop doing it.

#28

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My best friend is actually his uncle’s kid. Apparently he confessed to it on his death bed. The mum won’t admit anything and he can’t talk to anyone else in the fam about it.

#29

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I used to not eat and basically starve myself to feel hungry, just to feel.. something, and I had control over that aspect.

Tough home life with being groomed by mom and s**t. No contact for a couple years, and never had any sort of connection or love or emotions for family, it’s still hard to feel anything but I have an amazing fiance.

100% classic narcissism abuse.

#30

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That I haven’t been happy since he asked me for divorce a couple of years ago…. I was ready to follow through and last minute he backtracked, but he never said he was sorry, and I haven’t been able to fully come back from that…. I don’t think I love him the same since.