“What Would Be The Absolute Worst Name You Could Give Your Child?” (25 Answers)

Published 3 weeks ago

There are some children whose names seem designed to make fun of. It begs the question, what were the parents thinking when they chose that particular word as the calling name for their beloved child?

We know from our experiences in our youth how cruel the world can be—especially little kids who have no filter on their brains or mouths. But apparently, some parents have no problem choosing names for their kids that might make them the target of bullies. Recently, Redditors got to discussing the worst names that children have been given and we’ve shared the most egregious in the gallery below. 

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#1 X Æ A-12.

Image source: pyoid_loves_cats, The Royal Society

#2 Foreigner. Given to an impossibly white kid in very rural Oklahoma. He and his brother Journey had strange parents.

Image source: Accidental_Taco, Derek Owens/unsplash

#3 Candida – I know girls with it and I know it is wrong of me but can only think of thrush.

Image source: Timely_Egg_6827

#4 Meconium. She heard nurse say it at the birth and thought it pretty. The definition is “a baby’s first stool, usually black and tarry in nature, to dispel mucus and other embryonic matter.” ?‍♀️.

Image source: digitalgirlie, Christian Bowen/unsplash

#5 Neveah! Have some f*****g creativity! “It’S hEaVeN bAcKwArDs. BRB naming my child Natas.

Image source: mvachino67, claudiascakes/instagram

#6 My coworker named her baby “Orgasm”.

Image source: Ur_Sunsh1ne, Getty Images/unsplash

#7 Latrina.

Image source: Tryingbesttohelp, Blake Cheek/unsplash

#8 I knew a child named, I kid you not, Cl*toris. They pronounced it Klit-ress.

Image source: Overall_Lobster823, Getty Images/unsplash

#9 I was a camp counselor. One of the campers there was a girl named Beanz.

Image source: Odd-Builder7146, Andrej Lišakov/unsplash

#10 A lady I know named her son Kody, but spells it CHODE.. which means something completely different, imo.?.

Image source: Plenty-Mistake-6059, Nathan Dumlao/unsplash

#11 Princess. Not the absolute worst, but I don’t think I could ever take this person seriously. Please don’t give children names that you give pets.

Image source: ladyoffate13, Kelly Sikkema/unsplash

#12 I was once drunk in a Taco Bell, waiting for my order at the pickup counter. The employee comes over to announce the next order, goes to read the name on the bag, double takes.

Image source: Broad_Strokes_paint, fourbyfourblazer/flickr

“…Adolph?”

This m**********r walks up, head in shame. The employee literally said “that’s not funny” as the guy was trying to seriously explain that was his real name.

I think about that man often.

#13 Opponent of my son’s hs football team- Aero Smith.

Image source: brakjeeptj

#14 Pubert.

Image source: MithrasHChrist, Ayo Ogunseinde/unsplash

#15 Any name that is an expensive item. Rolex, Cartier, Mercedes, Diamond. Those are just str*pper names.

Image source: QualityPrunes

#16 I remember a girl going viral for naming her daughter C*ntley.

Image source: moonlunatiic666, Blake Cheek/unsplash

#17 Lawr’ryn and Lylyt Yvyh Yryhl (read as ‘Lilith Eva Uriel’).

Image source: Seasandshores, Spencer Davis/unsplash

#18 DOLPHIN. A girl at my school was named Dolphin.

Image source: Abject-Newt-2382, Mary Anne Twimbers/unsplash

#19 My husband has a friend named Mike Hunt. He’s real.

Image source: cudathepitbull

#20 The Abcde trend (absidee) has got to stop.

Image source: New-Owl-2293

#21 Void. Could never write or cash checks with that name.

Image source: dstarr3, RikkisRefuge Other/flickr

#22 There is a road in rural Ontario named after a local farmer, Harry Dyck. The road sign for Harry Dyck Road kept getting stolen. So they epoxy’d the sign to the post, and it remains to this day. True story.

Image source: libhater197666

#23 Moe Lester.

Image source: _ReDd1T_UsEr, Rockstar Games

#24 Naming a kid *anything* that sounds like a joke—like “Brick” or “Banana”—is just setting them up for a tough time. Imagine going through life introducing yourself as “Banana”… nah, that’s just cruel. Keep it cute, not crazy!

Image source: Sea_Development_2955, Nathan Dumlao/unsplash

#25 My great grandmother was named Crucifixa. Gotta love Italian Catholics back in the day.

Image source: Pinkysrage, Karolina Grabowska/unsplash

Shanilou Perera

Shanilou has always loved reading and learning about the world we live in. While she enjoys fictional books and stories just as much, since childhood she was especially fascinated by encyclopaedias and strangely enough, self-help books. As a kid, she spent most of her time consuming as much knowledge as she could get her hands on and could always be found at the library. Now, she still enjoys finding out about all the amazing things that surround us in our day-to-day lives and is blessed to be able to write about them to share with the whole world as a profession.

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children's names, funny, kid's names, names, parenting, worst names
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